Strengthening the Bonds of the Courtyard

I’m stepping into something new this week — a discipleship group at my church. It’s small, just a handful of women, most of whom I barely know. But the purpose is clear: to grow in the Word and in our relationships with God by growing in intentional, Christ‑centered relationships with each other.

One of the rhythms they emphasize is Scripture memorization. I’m curious about that. Scripture has never settled into my heart through repetition alone; it becomes “written” there when it takes root in meaning, in application, in the lived experience of it. Still, there’s something appealing about being able to call chapter and verse to mind with ease. When I think back to school, the only way I ever memorized anything was by writing it over and over again — names, dates, formulas, all of it. So perhaps I’ll buy a fresh notebook and start copying Scripture line by line, letting the muscle memory do its quiet work. What a shame, I do so hate purchasing new notebooks (she lied).

But the thing I’m most looking forward to isn’t the memorization. It’s the depth.

I am, by nature, terrible at small talk. I’m awkward, and I’ve never figured out how to represent anything true about myself by discussing the weather or summer travel plans. I come alive in the weeds — in the deep end of a conversation where the stakes are real and the masks come off. That’s why I make friends at work so easily: we dive straight into big, hairy problems together, and the personal moments feel like coming up for air rather than treading water on the surface.

I want that outside the office too. I want the kind of conversations where people stop performing and start being. I hope this group is that.

Of course, for “the real stuff” to happen, the space has to be safe. And in my past experiences, women’s programs have often been anything but. Too much theater. Too much martyrdom‑as‑currency. Too much glitter‑covered Bible‑swag and not enough truth. I could soapbox about the problems with Women’s Ministry™ for hours, but honestly, I’d rather talk about where my new church is getting it right.

A few weeks ago, I attended a women’s retreat — the kind of thing I normally avoid — and I was stunned by how safe it felt. The Gate is secure. The strong men of our congregation have taken their place there, upholding truth, protecting covenant bonds, and fortifying the barrier to entry: true repentance. Only then can restoration take root.

There are no wolves among the sheep.

I felt safe. I felt secure.

Inside that safety, the Courtyard flourishes. The walls are strong, so the emotions inside don’t run wild, they run deep. And because of that, the women could be unguarded. They could share freely. There was no one‑upping in suffering or encouragement — just real talk. A few testimonies, yes, but the heart of the weekend was about stewardship: what to do with what we’ve been given. How to give help. How to receive it. How to worship and give thanks as the hands and feet of God.

As I’ve been stepping into this new role of “mentor” — this older, slightly wizened church lady — the retreat reminded me that I am still very much a pilgrim. There is so much road ahead of me. And the Lord has given these women to help me walk it.

Each of our lives has been full of twists and turns, tests and blessings that have brought us to this congregation at this moment. You can feel the Holy Spirit moving through this church. There is a hunger here for deep, authentic relationships — with the Lord and with each other. These discipleship groups are evidence of that hunger. They’re not easy. They require daily self‑denial, surrender, and abiding in the Word. The goal is transformation — the renewing of the mind — by prioritizing Christ above everything else.

When God called me here, the word community rang in my ears. And now I see it growing. I see the bonds of sisterhood forming in the Courtyard.

I’ve never really had “Christian sisters” in the way Scripture describes — not just women I have things in common with, but women with whom I share this: a love for the Lord and a desire to be true disciples.

This next chapter feels like the beginning of something long‑prayed‑for. Something rooted. Something real.

I can’t wait!

Lord,  

thank You for the gift of community and for the sisters You’ve placed beside me in this season.

Thank You for safe gates, steady walls, and the joy of walking together in Your truth.

As we step into deeper fellowship and discipleship,

purify our motives and make complete the work of our hands.  

Shape our hearts to love what You love,

to seek Your Word with sincerity,

and to build one another up in grace.

Make us faithful disciples,

faithful friends,

and faithful daughters in Your house.

Amen.